Yes, remember that? On the old "Allen Report" site, this was the title of my weekend commentaries, though it started as "A Few Paragraphs from Jonathan Allen" from August-November 1998 and then "The Bottom Line" till the revamping in September 1999.

Since the only interesting things that were newsworthy this week were Brad and Angelina's new baby girl and Katie Couric kissing "Today" goodbye, I've decided dig through the archives (yes, I do keep all of the "NewsBeats" and "Plain Truths" dating back to October 2000; those prior to that -- including one from 1999 about the corporate renaming of event venues -- are gone forever) to bring you a couple of my greatest commentaries from "Plain Truth." The first one from March 13-14, 2004 was about how doing a lot of stuff while driving -- including talking on cell phones -- have become a lot distracting:

In the old days, the only thing worth doing while driving our vehicles is fiddling with the radio. Now, doing things while trying to keep our eyes on the road is becoming a nuisance.

Cell phones have of course started all this. 20 years ago when the first ones were introduced, they were expensive and the size of a brick. Nowadays, what they used to be luxuries are now considered vital, and the continuing growth of them worldwide have left payphones gathering dust for years.

But on cars meanwhile, it's really hard trying to get a call while driving, and too much talking may lead to life-threatening accidents. New York may be the only state with a permanent ban on cell use while driving, but Alaska and California (especially in Los Angeles, the freeway capital of the world) are among several states without a ban; others have partial bans. Around the world, many countries including Australia and those in Europe, Asia, the Middle East, Africa, and South America all have bans while in Canada, it varies.

Another thing we do on the road is eating. Then again, that's why we have rest areas along the interstates for! And now, we could watch TV or DVDs as well, and that is starting to irritate me. During our first and only road trip to the Lower 48 in 1988, the only thing I did on the road was schoolwork. Yes, I took some of my classes along with me, with a piece of paper detailing all the assignments I had to do.

I don't think these annoyances will go away anytime soon, especially the cell phone one. But if I would ever start learning to drive and later get a car, the only thing I would be doing would be -- what else -- listening to the radio!

Last summer during my two-week vacation in the South, I went on a Greyhound bus from Winston-Salem to Atlanta (though we had to change buses in Charlotte), and believe me...in an age when we can entertain ourselves with portable DVD players and iPods, the buses need a slight extreme makeover by putting in power supply outlets in every seat. It has happened on most new cars/vans/SUVs, why not Greyhound buses and planes (on domestic flights)?

On September 27-28, 2003, I commented on the excessive coloring of soft drinks. Due to the deaths of John Ritter and Johnny Cash a couple weeks earlier, I postponed it until later:

Sodas have been experimenting with different flavors for years and years now. Other than the regular cola flavors, we have vanilla, cherry, and lemon.

First, Pepsi. They started all this in 1975 when they came out with lemon-flavored Pepsi Light, followed by the "Wild Ones" line in 1991. Then there was Crystal Pepsi the following year. I tried it at one of their test markets in Denver while living in South Dakota, and when it became widely available months later reaction was mixed. Even "Saturday Night Live" spoofed it with Crystal Gravy, making Crystal Pepsi a laughingstock. The pain ended after a year.

Pepsi One came and went in the mid-'90s, featuring two people who really couldn't peddle soda too well: Oscar winner Cuba Gooding Jr. and later nutcase comedian Tom Green, whose late night show on MTV was canceled recently.

A couple of years ago, they debuted Pepsi Twist with a lemony flavor, followed later by Pepsi Blue and now Pepsi Vanilla.

As far as Coca-Cola is concerned? Well, we all remember New Coke being the "Gigli" of 1985, but Coke did clean up their act by introducing Cherry Coke thereafter. It was way more successful.

Coke resumed experimenting last year with Vanilla Coke. If you thought Cuba's Pepsi One ads were mute-button worthy, they were nothing compared to Chazz Palminteri hawking Vanilla Coke. I tried it once and it tasted more like cream soda than your usual Coke.

7up on the other hand came out with dnL several months ago, while Mountain Dew has Code Red and Livewire (the latter was a temporary thing), and Dr Pepper with Red Fusion.

In our household, we stopped drinking Coke and Pepsi altogether (unless at fast food restaurants) and now buy store brands without all the vanilla/colored/lemon junk. Generally, I drink water or Gatorade most of the time.

But for the last two decades, we have seen soft drinks colored themselves red, white, blue, green, and orange. I wouldn't be surprised if they come out with urine-flavored Coke; it would be the nastiest drink in history.

Several months ago, 7up launched 7up Plus with calcium and Vitamin C and its commercial starred "Desperate Housewives'" Marcia Cross and Nicollette Sheridan. In 2002, they had 7up Mint for Saudi Arabia; it was discontinued after a year because it tasted more like Scope mouthwash than soda. Cherry Vanilla Dr Pepper came out in 2004, the same year their Red Fusion was discontinued for the new drink.

As for Mountain Dew? After Code Red and Livewire, the experimenting continued with Pitch Black, Baja Blast (a Taco Bell-only flavor), Darth Dew (a 7-Eleven Slurpee flavor to coincide with the release of "Star Wars Episode III"), Pitch Black II, and MDX.

And just recently, Coca-Cola introduced a coffee-flavored version, Coca-Cola Blak. Actually, it debuted in France before making its way to the United States. Now I don't drink coffee (I'm into tea or hot chocolate), but I'm sure it tastes kinda nasty.

Anyway...that's our first trip down "Plain Truth" lane for now. Hope something better comes my way to talk about next time, so long!